“Zombies Vs. Strippers” (2012)

by on June 20, 2012  •  In Reviews

Full Moon is at it again, this time with the appropriately titled “Zombies vs. Strippers”. I’m fucking sick of zombies, but I can never get tired of strippers. Full Moon delivers a fun, sexy good-time horror-comedy with a mean streak here, utilizing every gag and pun available.

The girls are hot and the finale actually pays off in pretty bad ass affair.

Basically, a greasy stripclub owner is stuck with a club in a run-down neighborhood. Oh yes, the Tough Titty has seen better days than this. It is implied here and there that this once flourishing area has turned to doo-doo because of a prolonged zombie outbreak, but I must have misunderstood what I perceived as A LOT of innuendo, because everyone looked pretty damn surprised when *actual* zombies started showing up.

There is a black girl with an afro that I wish wasn’t a character in a movie. I wish she were real. And that actress needs more work… Hold on… Her name is Brittany Gael Vaughn! I actually took the time to imdb the movie to find out her name. In the age of the internet, that is a lot of attention to give someone. She is awesome, and I hope she is a nice person, because people need to HIRE THIS GIRL!

Despite loving both the character and the actress that played her, I thought Brittany was actually a little miscast in this role. The whole “ghetto” thing didn’t suit her. Give her some more roles, Full Moon! Everybody! Brittany, I’m going to try to cast you in every film I ever make. If you’re nice. If your awesomeness makes you mean, then we can’t be friends anymore.

On to the rest of the movie: The rest of the girls were great, I was digging on the actor that played the bouncer (get this guy more work too, as long as he’s not a jerk). He needs to play like a “Stooge” character from “Night of the Demons”. He’s great as the “cool overweight guy that gets hot chicks” character. Would love to see more of that. The blonde with the orange skin and awesome breasts, the chick with the amazing rear both had moments of greatness. I *loved* the “tough stripper” also.

OH HOLY SHIT! There is also a post-apocalyptic biker on this side of 50 that speaks in a pseudo-biblical tongue. That actor, that character, and his dialogue is BAD ASS. Hold on, I’m gonna look up that fucker’s name, too… BRAD POTTS! Brad, you are a bad motherfucker.

Aside from that, I honestly wasn’t too crazy about most of the male performances. It’s not necessarily a reflection of their acting ability, but maybe they just weren’t right for the part. The punk rock dude’s character was particularly annoying. I definitely would have enjoyed the movie more without that dude. Not attacking the actor here, just the character he was playing.

It’s just tons of fun. I feel silly about even including this disclaimer, BUT: This IS a Full Moon movie. If you’re not into this subculture of cinema, you obviously aren’t going to like this or any of their titles. But for the rest of you that like to have 1995 Cinemax after-midnight fun with no apologies, add this one to your collection.

Rating: ★★★¾☆ 

david

Sylvester Stallone

I'm Sylvester Stallone. I was in the hit film "Tango & Cash" opposite Robert Z'Dar.